EDIT

Only ageless quiet attends our altars
shrouds our days in motes and in shade, a half-life
lived in half-light. Even our fire can pale in
twilight and gray or
starve in empty temples though instinct never
Wavers, never dulls in the pitch - the God Who
Slumbers in the Waters still sleeps; the sun still
sets in our brother's
bloodless breast. We follow the endless arc to
guard the sun, descend to lustrate in gold-tipped
shrines where chanted litanies hailed the dawn. But
no one reveres us

now: a younger god has transfixed man's needy
eye. Unsung, we leave empyreal climes, slough the
night off (like a barnacle fastened to the
hip of the sun) to
pace abandoned Houses. In temple dusk we
wonder, will we ever again be met at
dawn? Be praised, our manifold Names half-sung? Will
anyone love us?

All Good Things Come In Threes...???

Last post. I swear it. It occurred to me, as I moved to close this browser tab, that I never posted my finished sapphic verse poem (click here for more details). It won't win any awards but here it is:

*



Only ageless quiet attends our altars
Shrouds our days in motes and in shade - a half-life
Lived in half-light. Even our fire can pale in
....Twilight and gray or
Starve in empty temples. But instinct never
Wavers, never dulls in the pitch: the God Who
Slumbers in the Waters still sleeps; the sun still
....Sets in our brother's
Bloodless breast. We follow the endless arc to
Guard the sun. Descend to lustrate in gold-tipped
Shrines where chanted litanies hailed the dawn. But
....No one reveres us

Now: a younger god has transfixed man's needy
Eye. Unsung, we leave empyreal climes, slough the
Night off (like a barnacle fastened to the
....Hip of the sun) to
Pace abandoned Houses. In temple dusk we
Wonder - will we ever again be met at
Dawn? Be praised, our manifold Names half-sung? Will
....Anyone love us?


photo & poem copyright belongs to: Shanee Gbelawoe

*

Shameless plug but do remember to check out the two posts following this one as they are new too! And about music!

Sapphics

Sappho by Charles Mengin [pic source: virgotex.wordpress.com]

I think I finally have my sapphic verse poem down... and still it is grossly inadequate. Sigh. The deeper I get into strengthening this poem, finding new and more detailed sources on the form, the more the poem seems wanting. A while back I found an example of sapphic verse written by (surprise!) Sappho which fulfilled the brief and is lovely to read. 'The Anactoria Poem' translated by Lattimore (an excerpt):

Some there are who say that the fairest thing seen
on the black earth is an array of horsemen;
some, men marching; some would say ships; but I say
.... she whom one loves best
[click on the stanza to read full poem]

Throughout this experience I have come upon various essays on craft and sapphics, each one opening my eyes to my flaws and, hopefully, influencing a better crafted poem in the end. In case someone else types 'sapphics' or 'Sappho' or 'sapphic verse' into a search engine looking for someone to shed a little light on the subject matter, I'll list (with links) the webpages and sites which are giving me a leg up, so to speak.

I started first with examples of sapphic verse and settled on three poets/poems --
* Sappho's 'The Anactoria Poem', trans. by Lattimore;

* Swinburne's 'Sapphics';
* Isaac Watts' 'The Day of Judgement';
These three helped me with the intangibles as it were -- the flow, the sense of the form. They also provided concrete help when my dactyls were kicking my butt. I didn't lift any from the poems it's just that seeing how others handled dactyls talked me "down from the ledge" whenever I over-thought my own.

* An audio track at least an 90 minutes in length, of Allen Ginsberg teaching Basic Poetics, specifically sapphic verse. You can download the track or simply listen to it; I highly recommend it. It is an invaluable listen. He presents the material in an approachable way. Here's his stab at sapphic verse (better than mere mortals) --

Red cheeked boyfriends tenderly kiss me sweet mouthed
under Boulder coverlets winter springtime
hug me naked laughing & telling girl friends
.... gossip til autumn

* I am currently rummaging through Eratosphere on AbleMuse.com for more insight on sapphics and meter in general. If you use the search function on the site and type in sapphics, as I did, you can find a wealth of information.

After I do some more clean-up; submit for critique and review my piece I'll probably post a draft of it on this blog soon.